So it’s def Monday; I dunno whether thats a good or bad thing anymore since I can’t work yet and I have no deadlines other than trying to talk/see Liam as much as I can. It’s funny: from what I remember or my life per-strike, this is everything I wanted. But now I feel the burden of my tribulations more than ever as I’ve realized the most important asset to my or any other persons herritage/linage is their offspring. It for me right now at least sums up the meaning of life. We are here to make a small mark; pass it on to the next generation for them to continue or make new mark; hopefully one day accumulating a generational portrait of what it meant and means to be alive.
Ok I went off on left field there Back to the main thesis. I am currently sitting in Vera’s office thinking already to next weekend on what to do with buhbuh. I know alor of my actions are convinced as immature/compulsive; but in order to accept my new “sours” I’m life, I’ve really had to suckle hard at whatever sweet has come my way. Liam’s presence has become the very center of that “sweet”.
He had a great time yesterday. And having Melissa there helped Vera and I immensely whilst his stay in respect to letting my energy “recharge” and giving poor Vera. “breather”. So much thanks is in order for her patience and kindness regarding the pleasantry of the matter :).
Overcast or not, Liam had a great time as always and as always our good times had to end; yet in hindsight the day was an impromptu success and liam left happy and fullfilld so the day was a success.
I had a lot of realizations this past weekend: some very positive and yet negative that follows close being (sour/sweet). I haven’t put mental phrasing to these yet so I will not comment until I now exactly how to say it correctly but like I said I’m not in the heartache business. Right now I gotta be the best Sadi can. And a else will follow. But one day I’m going to be faced with the hard fact that I got nothing else to focus on but me; and honestly scares the shit outta me.
I guess time will tell as I commonly say. But who knows. What I want ain’t what I need and what I need wants a vacation from it all lol. So what do I te myself when what I really need us me back and “me” is stil on a longnnnng paid vacation. Smh. I dunno